How to Write Dialogue— Creating Realistic Conversations
Think about all the people you know and what it is about their personalities that stand out to you. I’ll bet in at least some cases, your answer is based on how they speak. For example, the guy at the office who uses a certain phrase all the time, or the lady who lives down the block who always seems to be chomping on a stick of chewing gum and cracking it in between sentences. Or maybe you know someone sarcastic—always saying one thing but meaning another, in a mean or nice way. Or you have an uncle who is always cracking jokes or an aunt who talks so slowly, you want to shake the words right out of her. These types of characteristics make a person unique and memorable. The same applies to characters in a book.
Your protagonist, especially, needs to stand out. He or she can’t be run-of-the-mill, generic, and described in shades of gray. I’m assuming he or she will do great things—go on an exciting adventure, defeat or tame a dragon, save a princess, or win the heart of the love of her life. The protagonist must be someone special, not just a face in a sea of other faces, indistinguishable from every other person. Of course, you want him or her to be realistic. Even if you’re writing a fantasy, you need to assign traits your readers will believe. And “perfect” is just as boring as bland. But your hero or heroine needs special qualities, something that sets them apart. And to establish the individuality of your supporting characters, you should think along the same lines. Not necessarily “special” qualities, but unique and individual…just as people are unique and individual.
Creating true-to-life dialogue—minus all the boring chit-chat—is one main way an author can turn cardboard characters into a three-dimensional cast of characters who leap off the page. The kind of characters readers remember long after they’ve finished your book. Dialogue doesn’t just show a character’s personality. Well-crafted dialogue can move the plot forward and reveal the complexities of relationships.
Writing effective dialogue is both an art and a skill because it blends creativity with a few key writing techniques. Whether you’re writing a novel, screenplay, or short story, this article will help you master the art of crafting realistic dialogue that does more than one duty. For now, we’ll talk about conversations between two characters. Sometime soon, I’ll cover writing dialogue in scenes with more than two characters. Keep reading to learn how to make your characters' conversations as engaging and realistic as possible.
The Basics of Writing Dialogue
1. Understand Your Characters
Before you put words in your characters' mouths, you need to know who they are. Understand their backgrounds, personalities, motivations, and relationships. This understanding will shape their speech patterns, vocabulary, and tone.
Character Background: A character's education, upbringing, and culture influence how they speak.
Personality Traits: Is your character shy, confident, sarcastic, or sincere? Their personality will shine through their dialogue.
Motivations: What does your character want? Dialogue should reflect their goals and desires. However, keep in mind people don’t always mean what they say or say what they mean. Use this to your advantage.
Relationships: The way characters interact depends on their relationship dynamics. Friends, enemies, lovers, or colleagues will all speak differently to each other.
2. Keep It Natural
Natural dialogue mimics real conversation but is more focused and purposeful. Here’s how to achieve that balance:
Avoid Small Talk: Skip the mundane greetings and pleasantries unless they serve a specific purpose. Avoid using words to imitate sounds (um, er) unless they add to characterization.
Use Contractions: People rarely speak using formal language. Contractions like "don't" instead of "do not" make dialogue sound more natural. People pause, lose their train of thought, and sometimes switch gears and jump to a different topic. These are all excellent techniques to employ when you’re constructing your characters’ dialogue.
Vary Sentence Lengths: Mix short and long sentences to mimic the natural flow of conversation.
3. Show, Don’t Tell
Dialogue is a powerful tool for showing rather than telling. Instead of stating emotions, use dialogue to reveal them.
Example: Instead of writing, "John was angry," show it through his words and actions.
John slammed his fist on the table. "I can't believe you did that!"
Advanced Techniques for Effective Dialogue
4. Subtext: The Unspoken Truths
Subtext is the underlying meaning behind the words. It's what characters mean but don't say outright. Writing subtext adds depth and tension to your dialogue.
Example:
Character A: "Imagine seeing you here."
Character B: "Yeah, it's been a while." (Subtext: They’re uncomfortable seeing each other again.)
5. Conflict and Tension
Dialogue thrives on conflict and tension. Even friendly conversations can have an undercurrent of disagreement or differing opinions.
Create Stakes: Every conversation should have something at stake, whether it’s personal, professional, or emotional.
Use Interruptions: Characters interrupting each other can heighten tension and make dialogue more dynamic.
6. Distinct Voices
This brings us back to my opening paragraphs. Each character should have a unique voice. Their speech patterns, vocabulary, and tone should reflect their individuality. Keep these traits consistent with the character’s education and background.
Character Quirks: Give each character a distinct way of speaking. Maybe one uses a lot of slang, while another is more formal.
Consistency: Maintain these distinct voices throughout your story.
Unique Tips to Make Your Dialogue Stand Out
7. Eavesdrop for Inspiration
Real conversations are a goldmine for dialogue inspiration. Eavesdrop in public places (discreetly, of course) and take note of interesting exchanges.
Public Transport: Listen to how people talk on the bus or subway. Notice the brevity and sometimes abrupt nature of their conversations.
Cafes and Restaurants: These places are great for hearing how people interact in social settings.
8. Use Silence and Pauses
Silence can be as powerful as words. Use pauses and beats in your dialogue to convey hesitation, tension, or contemplation.
Example: "I... I don't know if I can do this," she said, her voice barely a whisper.
9. Overlap and Interruptions
People often talk over each other in real life. Incorporate overlapping dialogue and interruptions to add realism and dynamism.
Example:
Character A: "I think we should—"
Character B: "No, you’re not listening. We have to act now!"
10. Body Language and Actions
Dialogue is more than just words. Accompany dialogue with body language and actions to convey emotions and subtext.
Example: He crossed his arms and leaned back. "So, what’s your plan?" he asked, a hint of sarcasm in his voice.
11. Dialogue Tags and Action Beats
Vary your use of dialogue tags (he said, she asked) and action beats (descriptions of what characters are doing while talking).
Dialogue Tags: Keep them simple to avoid distracting from the dialogue.
Example: "I'm not sure," she said.
Action Beats: Use them to add context and depth.
Example: "I'm not sure." She glanced away, tapping her fingers on the table.
Common Pitfalls and How to Avoid Them
12. Exposition Overload
Avoid using dialogue to dump information. If you need to convey backstory or exposition (some piece of information readers need to know), weave it naturally into the conversation.
Example: Instead of a character explaining their entire history, let bits of it come out through interactions at relevant moments.
13. On-the-Nose Dialogue
Characters shouldn’t always say exactly what they mean. Allow for ambiguity and let readers read between the lines.
Example: Instead of "I’m angry with you," show it through their actions and subtext. "So, you just decided without asking me?" he snapped.
14. Avoid “As you know, Bob” Dialogue Exchanges
This happens when an author has one character tell another character something they already know, as a means of conveying the information to the readers.
Example: “As you know, Bob, my husband died yesterday,” Mildred told her brother. (Of course, Mildred’s brother knows her husband died, and people only talk this way if they’re being sarcastic or argumentative. This is not a good way to give readers information).
15. Avoid Talking Heads
This occurs when two characters are talking, and the author forgets to include introspection, action, or narrative. While readers love snappy dialogue, too much without a break or pause can become exhausting and unrealistic. Characters will pause to think, take a sip of water, pace, look out the window for an expected guest, put their coat on—whatever fits the scene you’re constructing. Breaking things up a little with introspection allows readers a moment to see what’s going on inside the point-of-view character’s head (and how it matches what he or she is saying, or not!), while using action is an excellent way of tying your characters to their setting and bringing in a sense of “place”. If she grabs her pink, fluffy, faux-fur lap rug and drags it over her knees then idly strokes the cat curled up beside her, we get a sense of her personality and a peak into her surroundings.
Practice Exercises to Improve Your Dialogue
14. Dialogue-Only Scenes
Write a scene using only dialogue, no narration or description. This exercise forces you to convey character, setting, and action through dialogue alone.
15. Character Conversations
Take two characters from your story and write a conversation between them about a mundane topic, like making dinner. Focus on how their personalities and relationship dynamics come through.
16. Rewrite Famous Dialogues
Take a famous dialogue from a book or movie and rewrite it in your own style or from the perspective of your characters. This helps you understand what makes dialogue memorable and effective.
Final Thoughts: Take Your Dialogue Writing to a Higher Level
Writing great dialogue isn’t as easy as just putting words on a page. An author must create a conversation that feels real, reveals character, and drives your story forward. By understanding your characters deeply, incorporating subtext, and using techniques like interruptions, introspection, action, and body language, you can write dialogue that captivates readers.
Remember, dialogue is where your characters truly come to life. So take the time to listen to real conversations, experiment with different styles, and most importantly, have fun with it. Your characters' voices are waiting to be heard.
Additional Resources
Websites: WritersDigest.com, HelpingWritersBecomeAuthors.com.
Podcasts: "Writing Excuses," "The Creative Penn."
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