Introspection & Deep Point of View

Using Direct & Indirect Thoughts to Pull Readers Deeper into Your Story

Deep point of view (often abbreviated as POV) puts the reader inside the character's head. Readers can imagine the character walking into the room, hearing bad news, arguing with her mother, or discovering a body, but they experience those moments from her perspective.

We see what she sees, and more importantly, we notice what she notices. We interpret each person she encounters and places she visits through her history with them, good or bad.

Before a writer can use deep point of view, they need to understand introspection. Some authors believe they need to pause the story’s action or forward momentum and give the protagonist time to think. They’ll create a short scene in which the protagonist is musing over some event. These longer periods of reflection (see sequel below) are fine when the story calls for it, but the writer misses dozens of other opportunities to draw readers deeper into the story by inserting short instances of introspection into the narrative.

The character might make a snap judgment, like this.

He wore a stained, tattered t-shirt and a pair of jeans with holes in both knees and covered in paint splatters.

Carrie forced a smile and returned his handshake. Gross. What kind of man comes to meet his new employer dressed like a bum? Obviously, the man had no class…

Or, maybe, the character suddenly realizes her father is lying to her.

“I have a business meeting tonight,” Father said, making a show of pulling on his riding gloves. “You and your mother will have to dine without me.”

He’s lying. Whatever he had planned, it had nothing to do with business. He hadn’t looked her in the eyes once since she entered the house. Instead of his normal, boisterous greeting, he’d bid her good evening in a soft voice while he’d fussed with his gloves. I don’t know what he’s up to, but I’d bet my right arm it’s not good.

I’ll provide several more examples in the following sections, but for now, keep in mind that introspection, used well, helps turn a character from someone the reader is watching from afar into someone the reader knows on a more intimate level.

What Exactly is Introspection?

Take a look at this sentence.

Mark was angry because his sister forgot his birthday.

That sentence gives us the necessary information. Mark is angry. His sister forgot his birthday. We even know why one caused the other.

But we don’t know much about Mark.

Now, read the paragraphs below.

“Good morning!” Sara pushed through the front door, making the little bell above her head jingle daintily. “Oh, hey, Mark, I didn’t expect to see you here. Do you know where Mom is? I need to talk to her. It’s important.”

Mark pointed with his thumb over his shoulder. “In the storage room counting boxes of tissue paper.”

He frowned as he watched his sister disappear into the back of the store. She forgot. Again. Sara could recite the name of every dog she’d owned since kindergarten, but apparently, her brain didn’t have enough mental stamina to remember his birthday. And I’m her only sibling!

Now we have a lot more information. We know he’s angry, but we can also tell he has a sarcastic sense of humor. He resents her inability to keep track of such a (to him) important date, and depending on what we’ve learned before and after this paragraph, we might realize he’s a little bit hurt. Using introspection, we’ve shown some of the history between them.

That is one of the most useful things introspection can do. Used appropriately, it reveals the emotion beneath the surface. While a character might smile and seem fine to anyone who’s looking, underneath, they might be experiencing any number of emotions they aren’t willing or able to admit.

A person might think, "I'm devastated that my sister forgot my birthday, which would indicate they’re very aware of their feelings, but a real person isn’t usually that in touch with their emotions. They might think something along the lines of, Typical. She forgot my birthday for the last two years. Why should this year be different?

Or, Whatever. I’m a forty-two-year-old man. Who cares about birthdays, anyway? (But then he reveals a little truth as he checks his phone again five minutes later to see if she sent a message. The contradiction between his thoughts and his actions is part of what makes him human…part of what makes him seem real). 

Private Commentary and Humor

Sandra tucked her chin and clamped her mouth shut before a snort escaped.

“He actually asked if my stylist used a bowl!” Carrie set her tea mug down with a thunk.

“Just ignore him.” Sandra patted Carrie’s sweater sleeve, careful not to look directly at her hair. “Looks fine. I’m grabbing coffee before the phones start ringing.”

She bolted toward the breakroom.

It wasn’t quite a bowl cut.

More like a bicycle helmet made of dark brown synthetic hair, sitting slightly crooked on Carrie’s head.

Sandra shut the breakroom door behind her, leaned her forehead against the cool glass on the front of the vending machine, and finally let herself laugh.

Sandra’s thoughts and actions tell us something her dialogue didn’t. She’s too kind to tell Carrie her haircut looks ridiculous. By using introspection that contradicts the character’s words, the writer can reveal a great deal about that character’s personality.

Self-Directed Frustration

Adam jammed his car keys into his pocket, his jaw aching from clenching his teeth.

Brilliant move, Adam. Invite her back into your life like the last three years never happened.

He rubbed the back of his neck where a familiar knot was already forming.

Lisa hadn’t changed. People didn’t suddenly grow a conscience in six months.

Yet here he was, walking across the parking lot of the diner she’d chosen, sweating through a clean cotton shirt.

Adam’s thoughts reveal things that readers would never know if the author used actions alone. He knows this is a bad idea, and he thinks he’s being foolish, but he’s doing it anyway. Most people can relate to a decision like the one Adam made. Most of us have done something we knew wasn’t the best idea. Using introspection to show the difference between what a character knows and what he does, makes him seem more human. As a result, readers will find him more memorable.

Bias Changes What a Character Sees

Frederick sat behind his walnut desk, hands folded atop a stack of quarterly reports.

“Fine work, Drew.”

Drew beamed and sat a little taller in his cheap suit.

Marianne stared at the chipped edge of her coffee mug.

Drew was an idiot.

Frederick had used that exact deadpan tone five minutes before he fired the entire intake team last October.

‘Fine work’ isn’t a compliment. Not coming from Fred. She risked a glance over the rim of the mug to check Drew’s expression. It hadn’t changed. Despite the lengthening silence and Fred’s lack of a smile, Drew still sat there grinning like a fool, believing he was safe. Poor guy…

Another character might interpret Frederick’s words differently. Drew certainly did. But this scene belongs to Marianne. We’re in her point of view, so we receive her interpretation.

This is an important part of deep POV that writers sometimes overlook. Deep POV does not mean the point of view character knows all. Their opinion might be just the opposite of the truth due to possible biases, jealousy, fear, prejudices, suspicions, and so on. They may have simply judged the situation wrong.

All this means that when the author uses introspection to draw the reader deeper into the story, they’re experiencing the events through the protagonist’s personal perspective and see things the same way the character sees them.

What We Say vs. What We Mean

“Seven works.” Kelly adjusted the strap of her gardening apron, squinting against the late-afternoon sun over Sam’s fence. “It’s just dinner at Sullivan’s. If we talk about the weather for two hours and leave, fine. No skin off my back.”

Sam waved and disappeared behind the overgrown private hedge.

Kelly let out a breath and picked up her trowel. Her palms were damp.

If Bob showed up expecting some bubbly woman who loved sports and laughed at bad jokes, he’d be looking for an excuse to leave before the appetizers arrived.

Just like the guy from the library who asked me to dinner two weeks ago.

She drew a deep breath and forced her attention back to her gardening.

In the above excerpt, Kelly pretends she doesn’t care, but her thoughts and actions tell a different story.

Readers often learn more about characters from their thoughts than the words they say or the face they present to the world.

Direct and Indirect Thought

Writers have a few basic ways to show a character’s thoughts on the page. They can use direct thoughts or indirect thoughts, or they can use a combination of both.

The difference is more about distance than any rules of grammar or writer’s craft. The choice an author makes depends on how close they want the readers to be to the exact words passing through the character’s mind at any one time.

Direct Thought

Direct thought gives us something close to the character’s actual internal words.

For example…

Footsteps crunched on the gravel outside the barn.

Don’t look at the window. Stay down.

Or…

Mark reached across the diner booth, his sleeve brushing her knuckles.

Move your hand. Right now.

Or…

The carriage slowed near the parish gates.

If Father sees this skirt, I’m dead.

Direct thoughts are often italicized, although house style and author preference vary. These thoughts also frequently shift into first person and present tense, showing the character’s thoughts as they think them. Although neither of those formats are absolute requirements, the author will want to take into consideration the standard within their genre and the style of the publishing house they plan to target, as most publishers have their own style guide. If your target readers are used to seeing direct thoughts in italics and present tense, consider using the more common format.

The important thing to consider is that direct thought feels like something the character is actually saying inside his or her own head.

Direct thoughts work especially well for:

• sudden realizations

• warnings

• instinctive reactions

• self-criticism

• disbelief

• brief emotional (internal) outbursts

• thoughts that sharply contradict what the character is saying aloud

A little direct thought can have a huge impact, but too much can start sounding as though the character has an internal commentator who’s narrating everything that’s happening to them.

Consider the following portion of a scene.

He’s coming toward me. Why is he coming toward me? I don’t want to talk to him. Maybe I should leave. No, that would look strange. I’ll stay here. I hope he doesn’t mention last night.

You can write that way, but an entire novel filled with this kind of internal play-by-play starts to sound strange. Most of those thoughts can be switched to narration. By creating certain specific direct thoughts, the author can highlight those ideas that are most important.

Oh, no! Peter! What’s he doing here?

He looked as handsome as ever, and he was heading her way. She considered making a run for the exit, but then dismissed the idea as she thought about how ridiculous she would seem. Instead of fleeing, she stood her ground, head held high. I just hope he doesn’t mention anything about last night…

Now let's look at the second way to include a character’s thoughts.

Indirect Thought

Indirect thought blends the character’s thinking into the narrative.

Instead of, Why is he coming over here? I hope he doesn’t mention last night, you might write, Ben was coming straight toward her. Great… Of the sixty-some people at this party, apparently the one person she needed to avoid had decided they should chat. And if he mentioned last night, she was going to throw herself into the swimming pool.

The narration is still third person, and the paragraph remains in past tense. But the author uses the protagonist’s word choices and way of speaking, and that is the key to effectively using indirect thoughts. The narrative voice takes on the character’s personality.

Compare the following examples.

Neutral:
The hotel room was small and poorly maintained.

Character A:
One hundred and eighty-nine dollars a night for a stained carpet, a wheezing air conditioner, and a bathroom apparently designed for kids and little people. She scowled and rubbed her elbow where she’d bumped it on the sink.

Character B:
The room wasn’t much, but the lock worked, the curtains closed all the way, and nobody downstairs had asked for ID.

Both characters are in the same room, but they’re two very different people with different priorities.

This is why indirect thought is so useful in deep POV. You don’t have to stop the story and announce that the character is thinking. The character’s personality and perspective are right there in the narration.

Turning Direct Thought Into Indirect Thought

Here’s the direct version.

Marcus watched the appraiser turn the gold locket over in his gloved fingers.

He knows it’s counterfeit. I can tell by the way he’s checking the clasp. I’m going to end up in a holding cell by noon.

Now, we’ll remove the direct internal monologue without losing Marcus’s fear:

Marcus watched the appraiser turn the gold locket over in his white cotton gloves.

The man squinted as he examined the hinge then lifted his loupe to inspect the faint tooling mark near the clasp.

He knew. In another thirty seconds, he’d be reaching under the counter for the silent alarm, leaving Marcus to explain to the cops about how a piece of counterfeit jewelry had come into his possession, and more importantly, why he’d tried to pass it off as the real thing.

The idea is the same, but the way we’ve expressed it to the reader has changed.

Now look at the paragraphs below. How might you rewrite them using indirect thoughts?

Lena stared at the email.

He gave the promotion to Eric. After everything I did for this company, he gave it to Eric.

Instead of changing first person into third person and stopping there, try to include Lena’s personality in your rewrite. In other words, don’t do something like this…

After everything Lena had done for the company, her boss had given the promotion to Eric.

That only changes the grammar. The POV is very distant, and we’ve included none of Lena’s attitude or emotions…

What would she notice? What specific grievance comes immediately to mind?

Maybe something like this…?

Fingers crossed, Lena scanned the email for the name of the employee who’d received the promotion.

“Congratulations…Eric Dumsworth?” she mumbled under her breath. The man who had once asked her how to attach a PDF to an email had somehow become her supervisor.

That paragraph gives us a lot more information about Lena’s situation and how she feels about Eric getting the job.

Introspection Should Add Something

One of the most common errors I see from authors using introspection is repetition. Here’s an example.

Tom opened the letter and read the first line.

Your application has been denied.

He couldn’t believe they had denied his application.

That last line, his thought, repeats the fact that his application was denied. There are better ways the writer could phrase this without repetition. Here’s one example.

Tom opened the letter and read the first line.

Your application has been denied.

Four months of forms. Three interviews. Two letters from doctors. And their response? One line. No apology, no details…just a single line.

The last paragraph, using indirect thought, doesn’t repeat something we already knew, and it adds new information to the story.

When you add introspection, ask yourself what the character’s thought tells the reader that the action, dialogue, or previous narrative hasn’t already told them.

It might reveal:

• history

• fear

• resentment

• desire

• an incorrect assumption

• a private joke

• a memory

• a plan

• a contradiction

• a relationship

• information the character knows that the reader doesn’t

If it does none of those things, you may not need it.

Filter Words: Useful Tool or Unnecessary Distance?

Writers are often told to eliminate filter words.

If you’re not familiar with the term “filter words,” here are a few common examples.

• she saw

• he heard

• she noticed

• he realized

• she wondered

• he thought

• she felt

The advice to remove those words exists for good reason. Filter words can put unnecessary space between the reader and the POV-character’s experience.

Compare sentence number one with sentence number two.

1. Ellen heard the radiator in the hall give two sharp metallic clanks. She noticed how cold the bedroom had become.

2. The radiator in the hall gave two sharp metallic clanks and died. Frost had already begun creeping up the inside corner of the bedroom window.

We don’t need to be told Ellen heard the radiator. If we are in Ellen’s POV and the sound appears on the page, readers understand that the character heard it.

The same applies to these two sentences.

1. She noticed the door was open.

2. The door was open.

And these two.

1. He realized the gun was gone.

2. The gun was gone.

The second version usually works better because it removes the filter words and draws readers deeper into the scene.

But filter words aren’t against “the rules.” Sometimes, the act of noticing, realizing, remembering, or deliberately listening is the important part.

For example, look at the short story excerpt below.

She’d walked past the photograph every morning for eleven years.

Today, for the first time, she noticed the man standing behind her father.

Here, the word noticed is an important part of the scene. The point isn’t simply that a man is in the photograph. The point is that she suddenly realized something she had somehow missed before.

Instead of deleting every filter word, the author should ask whether the filtering action helps to illustrate the scene’s point.

If it doesn’t, try removing it and see whether the sentence becomes stronger.

Practice: Strip Away the Distance

Let’s take a moment to practice some of what you’ve learned so far. Read the paragraph below, and then try to remove unneeded filter words or phrases.

Detective Vance saw the blood spatter on the wainscoting and felt a wave of nausea hit him. He remembered the last time he’d seen a room like this, back when he worked the night shift in Detroit. He knew the killer had taken his time, and he wondered if they were dealing with the same suspect who had slipped through their fingers in May.

Try removing saw, felt, remembered, knew, and wondered.

Here’s one possible way you might revise this.

Blood speckled the white wainscoting in an uneven arc, dark and already tacky.

Vance swallowed against the sour rise of bile.

Detroit all over again. That second-floor apartment off Woodward Avenue.

The deliberate spacing of the spray meant whoever held the hammer hadn’t rushed.

May’s phantom killer had come back for another round.

Note that removing filters does not mean removing Vance’s thoughts. Instead, his thoughts become part of the scene.

Ground Thoughts in the Character’s Actions

Long stretches of thought can start to feel as though the character’s body has disappeared. Here’s an example.

Julian sat on the park bench. He was terrified of losing custody of his daughter. He worried that his modest salary as an archivist wouldn’t impress the judge, especially compared with his ex-wife’s corporate career. He knew he loved his daughter more than anything, but love didn’t pay private-school tuition.

Nothing here is technically confusing. But Julian has become a talking—or, in this case, thinking—head, sitting on a park bench.

Let’s try giving him something physical to do.

Julian folded the court summons until the paper creased then smoothed it flat against his trousers.

Again.

His pay stubs from the historical society were stapled to the back—forty-two thousand a year to preserve nineteenth-century church records.

Maya’s corporate tax return showed five times that amount on the first page.

Would a judge care which parent reads bedtime stories? Who stayed home when Sophie had the flu? Who knew she hated the crusts on grilled cheese sandwiches?

Or would he look at the numbers and see the brick townhouse, the private school, and the parent who could afford both?

The second version works better because Julian isn't sitting on a park bench thinking about custody simply because the author needs to explain what's at stake. The court papers in his hands give him a reason to think about it. Whenever he looks at the numbers, he's reminded of what he could lose.

Giving a character something physical to interact with can also keep a long passage of introspection from feeling disembodied. The character can fold a letter, wash dishes, pace the room, sort through photographs, or stare at a text message while they're thinking. The action doesn't have to be dramatic. It just needs to work for the scene and, ideally, connect in some way to whatever is going through the character's mind.

Introspection and Pacing

You may have heard that characters shouldn't think during action scenes. I disagree with that advice, at least when it's stated as an absolute rule. People don't stop thinking because they're frightened or under pressure. Their thoughts simply become shorter and more focused on whatever they need to do next.

Imagine someone running from an armed intruder.

That probably isn't the moment for something like this >>

As she ran, Melissa remembered how her father had always told her that courage wasn't the absence of fear but the willingness to act despite it. She wondered whether he would consider her courageous now.

But something like this might work >>

The back door.

Ten feet.

Locked.

Shit.

The window.

During a high-stakes scene, a character may still think things like, Where is he? Too far. Move. Not that door. Get up. Those thoughts don't interrupt the action because they're part of the character's immediate response to the danger.

Once the danger has passed, the writer has more room. The character might replay what happened, question a decision, recognize something she missed, connect the event to an earlier memory, or finally admit what frightened her most.

The amount and type of introspection should fit what's happening in the scene. If your character is running for her life, she probably isn't going to spend three paragraphs analyzing her childhood. If she's sitting alone in her car ten minutes later with shaking hands and nowhere she has to be, she might.

Beware of Convenient Introspection

Characters sometimes think things for the reader’s benefit that they would have no reason to think about.

For example:

Robert looked across the table at his younger brother, Daniel, who was thirty-eight years old and who had worked as a cardiologist at St. Luke’s for the past eleven years.

Unless Robert has recently suffered a head injury, he probably knows who his brother is. That information exists because the author wants the reader to know it.

The same problem appears in relationships:

Sarah smiled at her best friend of twenty-two years.

Or backstory:

He recalled the accident five years ago that had killed his wife Jennifer.

People usually don’t mentally summarize facts they already know.

Instead, find a reason the information matters now.

Daniel reached for a third strip of bacon.

Robert raised an eyebrow. “Aren’t you a cardiologist?”

“Which means I know exactly what this is doing to me.”

“That is not as reassuring as you seem to think.”

Now Daniel’s profession comes up naturally and the relationship feels real.

Let Characters Be Wrong

This may be one of the most useful things you can do with introspection. Just because we're inside a character's head doesn't mean the character is right.

Suppose Rachel sees her husband turn his phone facedown when she enters the room.

He's hiding something.

That's Rachel's interpretation of what she saw, and depending on what has happened earlier in the story, the reader may believe her. But maybe he was ordering her birthday present. Maybe his sister texted him about a private medical problem. Or maybe he is hiding something, but not what Rachel assumes.

Deep POV allows the reader to experience Rachel's suspicion without requiring the author to confirm that her suspicion is correct. You can use that difference to create tension, misdirection, conflict, and sometimes, heartbreak.

We interpret other people's words and actions based on what we know, what we think we know, our past experiences, our fears, and our biases. Sometimes we're right. Sometimes we're very wrong. Your characters should be allowed to make those same mistakes.

Watch for Thoughts That Sound Like the Author

A nineteen-year-old college freshman, a seventy-year-old retired welder, a homicide detective, and a medieval farm girl shouldn't all think in the same vocabulary. This sounds obvious, but it can be surprisingly difficult to catch in our own work.

Imagine a scene with a mechanic looking at an engine.

The vehicle appeared to have suffered significant mechanical failure that would require extensive repairs.

Would the mechanic think like that? Use those words or phrases? Probably not. 

But he might think something more along the lines of this >> Timing belt was gone. Probably bent half the valves with it. There went Saturday.

A character's knowledge and experience affect what they notice and understand. Their personality affects how they interpret what they see. Their mood may determine what matters to them at that particular moment, and their history will affect the memories and associations the situation brings to mind.

All of those things can show up in the character's thoughts. If you removed a paragraph of introspection from one character's scene and dropped it into another character's scene without changing a word, would it still fit? If so, the passage may need more of the POV character’s personality in it.

A Few Common Problems

The Refrigerator Monologue

A character opens the refrigerator and suddenly spends four paragraphs analyzing her childhood, failed marriage, fear of abandonment, relationship with her mother, and inability to trust men.

Those thoughts may all be important, but the writer still needs to ask why the character would be thinking about all of them right now. Give the introspection a trigger that makes sense within the scene.

The Amateur Therapist

Unless it fits the character, be careful about having people diagnose themselves in therapy language.

Take a look at the following sentence. Most people don’t think like this.

I’m engaging in avoidance behavior because of unresolved childhood trauma.

But they might think something like this.

If I open that blue envelope, I’m going to throw up.

And the second one tells us more about the character, too.

The Echo

Dialogue: “I never loved you.”

Thought: He couldn’t believe she had never loved him.

The thought hasn't added anything because the dialogue already told us she never loved him. Instead, use the character's reaction to go deeper into the protagonist’s thoughts, and show readers what’s going on beneath the surface.

“I never loved you.”

Fourteen years… He’d given her fourteen years, and apparently, she’d been waiting until Tuesday afternoon in a Target parking lot to mention that particular detail.

Now the thought adds personality, history, disbelief, and anger.

Everyone Sounds Alike

If you can move a paragraph of introspection from one POV character to another without changing anything, take another look.

What would this particular person notice?

What would she compare it to?

What would she refuse to admit?

What does she know that another character wouldn’t?

What does she misunderstand?

Those questions can help you find the personality of that particular character.

Quiz: How Well Can You Spot Effective Introspection?

Some have a simple answer. Others require you to think about what the passage is trying to accomplish.

1. Which sentence brings us closest to the character through indirect thought?

A. She wondered if the rain would ever stop ruining her morning runs.

B. Rain hammered the porch roof, turning the driveway into a brown swamp and wrecking another Saturday run.

C. I really hate this rain, she thought.

D. She felt irritated because rain kept her from running.

2. Why might a writer choose direct thought instead of indirect thought?

A. Direct thought is always deeper POV.

B. It can give a sudden reaction or realization extra emphasis.

C. Third-person fiction requires direct thought.

D. Direct thought eliminates the need for characterization.

3. Which sentence contains a filter that probably isn’t doing useful work?

A. The linoleum was cold and sticky beneath his bare feet.

B. He noticed the heavy iron latch had slipped out of its groove.

C. Paint peeled from the tool shed in gray curls.

D. A damp metallic smell rose from the drain.

4. When might “she noticed” be worth keeping?

A. Never. Filter words should always be deleted.

B. When the fact that the character has newly become aware of something matters.

C. Whenever the author wants to slow the scene.

D. Only in omniscient POV.

5. Read this passage:

The cellar door creaked open.

Mark froze on the third step.

If that was the watchman, he had about four seconds before the flashlight swept across the floor.

What type of introspection appears in the final sentence?

A. Direct thought

B. Author commentary

C. Indirect thought

D. Omniscient narration

6. Which version gives us the most useful information about the character?

A. Maria was nervous about the interview.

B. Maria felt nervous as she waited for the interview.

C. I’m so nervous, Maria thought.

D. Maria checked the folder again. Résumé. References. Portfolio. The only thing missing? Instructions for explaining a six-year hole in her employment history.

7. Which sentence sounds most like a character thinking rather than an author explaining psychology?

A. Her grief caused her to redirect anger toward her sister.

B. She recognized that she was using anger to avoid grief.

C. Her sister didn’t deserve it, but screaming about burnt toast was easier than opening Mom’s closet.

D. She experienced emotional displacement caused by unresolved grief.

8. During a fast action sequence, which approach will usually preserve the most tension?

A. Remove all thought.

B. Stop frequently to explain the character’s motivation.

C. Use brief thoughts tied to danger, decisions, sensations, and immediate goals.

D. Use long italicized internal monologues.

9. Which excerpt gives us the strongest sense of a character’s particular knowledge?

A. The horse looked tired.

B. The gelding stood with his hocks turned out and his head hanging below his withers. Three miles on that rocky ridge road had worn the poor beast down, and Sam didn’t have another shoe in his saddlebag.

C. Sam noticed that the horse was exhausted.

D. This horse is very tired, Sam thought.

10. What is the biggest problem with this passage?

David jumped from the burning car. As he rolled across the asphalt, he remembered the afternoon his father had taught him to steer into a skid. It had been raining that day, and his father had smelled like wintergreen gum and pipe smoke. He’d been fourteen and terrified of scratching the family Buick. His father had laughed and told him—

Flames burst from beneath the hood.

David scrambled toward the embankment.

A. Memories cannot occur during action scenes.

B. The memory is too specific.

C. The memory interrupts an immediate emergency long enough to damage the pacing.

D. Deep POV does not allow flashbacks.

11. What is wrong with this introspection?

Rebecca watched her brother cross the room. Michael was forty-five years old and had been married to his wife, Jennifer, for seventeen years. They had two children, ages twelve and fourteen.

A. Nothing.

B. Rebecca probably has no reason to mentally recite basic facts she already knows about her brother.

C. Deep POV doesn't allow character descriptions.

D. Family information cannot appear in introspection.

12. Which version avoids repeating information the reader already knows?

The letter read: YOUR LOAN APPLICATION HAS BEEN DENIED.

A. He realized the bank had denied his loan.

B. He couldn't believe his loan had been denied.

C. They denied it.

D. Six years without a late payment, and the bank still managed to reduce him to a red DENIED stamp on a form letter.

13. A character sees her husband quickly turn his phone face down when she walks into the room and thinks, He’s cheating.

Does deep POV mean the husband must actually be cheating?

A. Yes. A POV character’s thoughts must be factually accurate.

B. No. The thought tells us what she believes, not necessarily what is true.

C. Yes, unless the book is a mystery.

D. No, but only if she later admits she lied.

14. Which question is most useful when revising a passage of introspection?

A. Have I included enough thoughts on every page?

B. Did I avoid every filter word?

C. What does this thought give the reader that they don’t already have?

D. Did I italicize all important thoughts?

15. Read this:

“You’re fine with me going?” Jake asked.

“Of course.” Nina smiled and handed him his jacket.

The blue one.

Naturally he was wearing the blue one.

She’d told him twice that it made his eyes look good, which apparently made it the perfect thing to wear while having drinks with his ex-girlfriend.

What does the introspection accomplish?

A. It tells us Nina likes blue.

B. It repeats the dialogue.

C. It reveals the difference between what Nina said and how she feels.

D. It proves Jake plans to cheat.

Answer Key

1. B. The irritation comes through the description itself without stopping to tell us that the character is irritated.

2. B. Direct thought can place extra emphasis on a quick, sharp reaction. It isn’t automatically “deeper” than indirect thought; both can create intimacy.

3. B. In most contexts, simply writing The heavy iron latch had slipped out of its groove gives us the observation without the extra step.

4. B. Sometimes the act of noticing is the point. A filter word is a tool, not a grammatical weed that must be pulled every time it appears.

5. C. The thought remains in third person and past tense, but the assessment belongs to Mark.

6. D. We already understand that Maria is nervous. More importantly, we learn what she’s nervous about, and that information gives the emotion a specific source.

7. C. It expresses the character’s grief through a concrete situation rather than having her diagnose herself.

8. C. Characters can still think under pressure, but their thoughts will usually become shorter and more immediate.

9. B. The vocabulary and practical details reflect Sam’s knowledge of horses. Another character looking at the same animal might notice something completely different.

10. C. The problem isn’t that David remembers his father. A quick flash of memory might work beautifully. The problem is that the story pauses a burning-car emergency long enough for David to settle into a leisurely recollection.

11. B. The information may be important to the reader, but Rebecca already knows it. Find a present reason for one or more of those facts to matter.

12. D. The other choices simply repeat the information in the letter. D gives us the character's reaction, showing what rejection means to him.

13. B. Deep POV gives us the character’s interpretation of events. Characters can make bad assumptions, misunderstand people, miss clues, and convince themselves of things that aren’t true.

14. C. This question catches a surprising number of problems. If a thought isn't giving the reader anything new, take another look at whether it needs to be there or whether it could do more.

15. C. Nina’s dialogue says she is fine. Her thoughts tell a very different story. We also learn exactly what detail has snagged her attention—the shirt—which makes the jealousy feel specific rather than generic.

One Last Test for Your Own Manuscript

When you revise a scene written in deep POV, don’t simply search for places where you can add more thoughts.

Instead, look at the thoughts already there and ask:

Would this character really think that now?

Is this thought here because the character needs to think it—or because I need to tell the reader something?

Does the thought reveal anything we don’t already know?

Does it sound like this particular character?

Is the character interpreting what happened, or merely repeating it?

Could the thought reveal a contradiction between what the character says, believes, wants, and does?

Is the character certain about something they could actually be wrong about?

Does the amount of introspection fit the pace of the scene?

Would a direct thought make this particular moment hit harder, or would indirect thought keep the reader closer?

Am I using a filter word because it helps the sentence, or simply because it was the first way I thought to write it?

What would this character notice that another person wouldn’t?

What would this character deliberately avoid thinking about?

The answer to that last question may provide the most interesting information. Sometimes, what a character refuses to think about tells us as much as the thoughts they allow themselves to have. They may avoid a topic or just change the subject every time they get too close to the truth. Sometimes, they might experience emotions they can't quite identify yet. You don't have to explain all of that to the reader. In fact, you probably shouldn't. Let readers learn about the character through deep point of view. Choose the thoughts that reveal something worth knowing and that make the reader feel as though, for a little while, they’re experiencing the story from inside the protagonist’s mind.

Unlocking the Secrets of Iconic Characters: A Guide for Mystery Novel Authors

Smartphone contains image of a woman sitting on the floor typing on an old-fashioned typewriter.

Creating memorable characters is a little bit like creating a new life. Iconic detectives like Sherlock Holmes, Hercule Poirot, and Miss Marple have captivated readers for decades, and not just because they crack tough cases. Readers love them because they feel authentic and relatable. These characters have distinct quirks, strong motivations, and detailed, interesting backstories that make them unforgettable. By learning from these literary legends, we can craft characters who stand out and keep readers glued to the page from start to finish.

Character creation is a crucial writing technique that falls under the broader category of narrative craft. While many elements contribute to effective storytelling, mastering character development is essential for creating a compelling and engaging mystery novel. For more on the importance of character development, check out this article on How to Write Compelling Characters from MasterClass.

Let's find out what makes these classic detectives so effective and how we can apply these techniques to our writing.

Iconic Detective Characters - An Overview

 

Sherlock Holmes: The Mastermind

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's Sherlock Holmes isn't just a brilliant detective; he's a complex individual with a knack for observation and deduction. Holmes has a background as a private investigator, often collaborating with Scotland Yard on high-profile cases. He notices details that others overlook—like the ash from a specific type of cigar or the faint scent of perfume on a suspect's clothing. His quirks, such as playing the violin when he's deep in thought or conducting chemical experiments in his apartment, add depth and make him intriguing. Despite his cool, logical approach, Holmes has a soft spot for his friend Dr. Watson, showing that even the most analytical characters benefit from emotional connections. For a deeper dive into Holmes's character, visit the Arthur Conan Doyle Encyclopedia.

Hercule Poirot: The Perfectionist

Agatha Christie's Hercule Poirot is famous for his meticulous nature and his distinctive, carefully groomed mustache. Before becoming a detective, Poirot served as a Belgian police officer during World War I, an experience that shaped his moral views and his methodical approach. He relies heavily on his "little grey cells," using his sharp mind to solve cases by understanding the psychology behind people's actions. Poirot's sense of justice and his need for order drive his investigations, and his quirks—like his obsession with symmetry—give him personality. Aspiring writers can learn from Poirot by giving their characters strong, psychologically driven motivations and distinctive habits that set them apart.

Miss Marple: The Unseen Hero

Miss Marple, another classic from Agatha Christie, seems like a sweet, elderly lady from a quiet English village. But beneath her unassuming exterior lies a sharp mind and a deep understanding of human nature. Her background in village life gives her unique insight into people's behaviors; she often relates the actions of suspects to those of her neighbors back home. For example, she might solve a case by comparing a suspect's sly demeanor to that of the local gossip who spreads false rumors. Miss Marple's quiet persistence and keen intuition remind us that characters who defy expectations can bring an element of surprise and depth to a story. Learn more about Christie's iconic characters at the official Agatha Christie website.

Crafting Compelling Characters

Building a Strong Backstory

When we create a character's backstory, we give them reasons to think and behave in certain specific ways. Sherlock Holmes's private investigator background explains his methods and connections with law enforcement. Poirot's experiences in World War I shaped his strict moral code and ignited his fiery passion for justice. Miss Marple's deep ties to the people and lifestyle in her village helped hone her ability to understand human nature on an intimate level. By scattering details about your characters' past experiences into the story, you can make their actions and decisions more believable and relatable. Tip: Don't write five pages in a row of backstory information; it'll kill the forward momentum of your plot. Instead, dribble the information in here and there, as needed, in areas where it makes the most sense. For example, if you're describing your character's current-day home through their perspective/POV, you might include the character's thoughts on how the mansion he's in now compares to the shack where he grew up.

Embracing Flaws for Realism

Creating a flawed protagonist makes him or her more human and interesting. Holmes's aloofness and occasional arrogance, for example, hide the difficulties he has when it comes to connecting with others emotionally. Poirot's vanity and obsession with order hint at his need for control. Miss Marple's age often leads people to underestimate her, but she has learned how to use their misconception to her advantage. Flaws create tension and provide opportunities for the character to grow and change. In addition, readers relate more readily to a flawed character because they see themselves—and their imperfections—reflected back at them from the page. For more on creating flawed characters, check out this article on Creating Flawed Characters from Writer's Digest.

Tapping Into Universal Emotions

Universal emotions, such as curiosity, moral outrage, or empathy, often drive the motivations of great detectives. The thrill Holmes gets when he solves puzzles stems from his love for intellectual challenges. Poirot's desire for justice comes from his deep sense of morality and need for order. These parts of his personality were shaped by the chaos he witnessed during the war. Miss Marple's curiosity is tied to her empathy for others. Her search for the truth is often prompted by her desire to protect innocent people. By using universal emotions as part of what drives your characters' behavior (their motivation) to universal emotions, you make their actions more understandable and relatable to read

Boosting Narrative Engagement

Developing Meaningful Relationships

The relationships your characters form can reveal their true selves and drive the plot forward. Holmes's friendship with Watson provides a dynamic mix of camaraderie and contrasting viewpoints, adding emotional depth to their cases. Poirot's interactions with a rotating cast of suspects and clients show his knack for reading people and uncovering hidden motives. Miss Marple's connections to her neighbors often give her crucial insights, as she draws parallels between village gossip and the clues she finds. Consider how your protagonist's key relationships and their interactions with other characters might affect the plot, shape the core ideas, or influence their approach to solving the mystery.

Balancing Plot and Character Development

To create a gripping mystery, you need to balance plot twists with character growth. In Holmes's stories, his cases test his intellect and his personal limits. Poirot's investigations often challenge his beliefs about morality and justice. Miss Marple's encounters lead her to evaluate her beliefs on human nature and empathy. When you create plot events that tie in with a character's growth, change, or development, you create a richer story because readers will care about both the mystery and the people solving it.

Keeping Readers Hooked with Emotional Engagement

To hold your readers' attention, build suspense and develop characters they can connect with. Quirky, flawed characters like Holmes and Poirot have interesting personalities and sometimes show their vulnerability. This makes them more relatable and makes readers want to finish the book to see how things turn out for them. Consider using universal themes like justice, revenge, or love to add deeper meaning to your stories. Use dialogue and direct and indirect thoughts to reveal your characters' emotions. Doing so will give readers a peek into the characters' minds and make the story feel more personal and immersive.

Experimenting with New Storytelling Techniques 

Writing and creating new characters and stories should bring you joy. You shouldn't dread the thought of sitting down to work on your manuscript. Try to have fun with it. Don't be afraid to try new ideas and techniques—in your life and in your writing. Vary the narrative perspective, choose an unusual location for your story setting, or mix genres to create something unique. Turn traditional tropes on their heads, surprise readers with unexpected twists, and make your mystery novel stand out. For inspiration on innovative storytelling techniques, visit Now Novel's guide on creative writing techniques.

Writing Tips from Mystery Legends

Learning from the Classics

There's much to learn from classic mystery stories like those featuring Holmes, Poirot, and Miss Marple. Study how the authors of the books balanced suspense with character development. Pay attention to the pacing, the buildup of clues, and the resolution of each case. By applying these techniques, you'll be well on your way to creating a fully fleshed-out story that will capture readers' imaginations.

Final Thoughts for Aspiring Writers

Finding Your Unique Voice

Your voice is what makes your stories special. Although many writers either knowingly or unwittingly copy another author's style, this isn't something you need to worry about doing. Instead, focus on what makes your writing unique, and let your personality come through. The more you write, the stronger your unique author voice will become. Experiment with different techniques, but always stay true to your voice. Eventually, you'll attract a loyal following of readers who enjoy the personality you bring to your stories.

Reflecting on Your Growth as a Writer

Writers who continually study different aspects of their craft, read and analyze the works of other authors, and write regularly will see improvement over time. Take a moment now and then to look back at your work, recognize how you've improved, and then set new goals. You could even keep a journal to track your challenges and breakthroughs. Be open to feedback and willing to make changes, but stay true to your voice—the elements that make your writing unique—and remember to celebrate your wins, no matter how small.

Ready to create unforgettable characters and mystery novels readers can't put down? Try incorporating some of the ideas in this article, and you're sure to write a story that will keep readers hooked from beginning to end. For more writing resources and tips, visit Writer's Digest and explore their wealth of articles on crafting compelling fiction.

• Writer's Craft Topics
• Characterization
• Dialogue
• Coaching
• Author Coaching

The Best-Selling Thriller and Detective Novelists of 2020-2024

Between 2020 and 2024, the thriller and detective fiction genres saw several authors rise to the top of bestseller lists. These authors, including James Patterson, Tana French, David Baldacci, Michael Connelly, Kathy Reichs, and Dennis Lehane, distinguished themselves through their masterful storytelling and consistent ability to captivate and entertain their readers. The other day, I was curious about these authors and what they might have in common, as well as what we could learn by analyzing their work. So, I turned to my good friend, ChatGTP, and conducted a kind of interview. A transcript of this “talk” is listed below. I thought some of you might find this interesting, especially as I went deeper and asked for more information and explanations. Enjoy!

A Comparison of Bestselling Detective & Thriller Novelists

(My initial question to ChatGTP 4.0)

Who are the bestselling detective fiction writers, using the time period 2020 through 2024

ChatGPT

Searched 6 sites

The genres of thriller and detective fiction have seen significant overlap and numerous bestselling authors from 2020 to 2024. Here are some of the top authors in detective fiction during this period:

1. James Patterson - Known for his prolific output and popular series such as Alex Cross, Patterson remains a dominant figure in detective fiction. His books, including collaborations like "Three Women Disappear," have consistently topped bestseller lists​ (Novel Suspects)​​ (Dead Good)​.

2. Tana French - French has garnered acclaim for her atmospheric and character-driven detective novels. Her books "The Searcher" and "The Hunter" feature retired detective Cal Hooper and have been widely celebrated for their slow-burn suspense and intricate plots​ (Novel Suspects)​​ (Five Books)​.

3. David Baldacci - With series like Atlee Pine and Amos Decker, Baldacci has remained a bestselling author in the detective fiction genre. His books are known for their compelling characters and fast-paced plots​ (Novel Suspects)​.

4. Michael Connelly - Connelly's Harry Bosch series continues to be a favorite among readers, with new entries frequently hitting bestseller lists. His skill in crafting intricate mysteries and authentic law enforcement characters keeps his work in high demand​ (Five Books)​.

5. Kathy Reichs - The creator of the Temperance Brennan series, Reichs has continued to captivate readers with her forensic-based detective stories. Her background in forensic anthropology adds a layer of authenticity to her novels​ (Dead Good)​.

6. Dennis Lehane - Known for his deep character studies and gripping plots, Lehane's work, such as "Small Mercies," has been recognized with nominations for prestigious awards like the CWA Gold Dagger​ (Five Books)​.

These authors have successfully blended the tension and suspense of thrillers with the methodical and investigative elements of detective fiction, appealing to a wide range of readers and maintaining strong sales over the past few years.

Me:

Are you able to analyze the stories written by these 6 authors to find out what, if anything, they're doing differently when compared to other, lesser-selling authors? I'm referring to their writing techniques. The types of characters they develop, their use of certain stylistic tools, etc. Also, do these authors have anything in common regarding their stories? I'm not even sure what that might be. For example, they all have fast-paced plots (but that's not true based on what you just told me). However, are you able to find anything that these "master" storytellers do differently?

ChatGPT

Analyzing the works of bestselling authors like James Patterson, Tana French, David Baldacci, Michael Connelly, Kathy Reichs, and Dennis Lehane reveals several key techniques and commonalities that distinguish their writing from lesser-selling authors.

Common Techniques and Stylistic Tools

1. Character Development

   • Complex Protagonists: These authors often create deeply complex and multi-dimensional protagonists. For example, Michael Connelly’s Harry Bosch is a seasoned detective with a rich backstory, personal flaws, and a strong moral compass, making him relatable and compelling​ (Five Books)​.

   • Relatable Characters: Tana French excels in crafting characters with relatable struggles and psychological depth, such as Cal Hooper in "The Searcher," who is dealing with retirement and a divorce​ (Novel Suspects)​​ (Five Books)​.

2. Plot Construction

   • Intricate Plots: These authors are masters of intricate and well-constructed plots. James Patterson is known for his fast-paced, plot-driven stories with numerous twists and turns that keep readers hooked until the last page​ (Novel Suspects)​​ (BookAuthority)​.

   • Layered Mysteries: Tana French and Dennis Lehane weave complex mysteries that unfold gradually, maintaining suspense and engagement. French’s slow-burn style allows for a deep exploration of the setting and characters while gradually revealing the plot​ (Five Books)​​ (BookAuthority)​.

3. Use of Realism and Authenticity

   • Professional Backgrounds: Kathy Reichs, with her background in forensic anthropology, brings a high level of authenticity to her novels. Her detailed descriptions of forensic processes add credibility and intrigue to her stories​ (Dead Good)​.

   • Realistic Settings: Michael Connelly’s novels often feature realistic settings based on his extensive research and experience as a crime reporter. This authenticity helps ground the stories in a believable world, enhancing reader immersion​ (Five Books)​.

4. Narrative Style

   • Engaging Prose: These authors use engaging and accessible prose that balances descriptive detail with narrative momentum. James Patterson’s writing style is concise and direct, making his books quick and enjoyable reads​ (Novel Suspects)​​ (BookAuthority)​.

   • Atmospheric Writing: Tana French’s atmospheric writing style creates a vivid sense of place, which is crucial for building suspense and setting the tone of her novels​ (Novel Suspects)​​ (Five Books)​.

Commonalities Among the Authors

1. Strong Sense of Place

   • Many of these authors emphasize the setting as a crucial element of their stories. For instance, Dennis Lehane’s novels often feature Boston as a backdrop, which becomes almost a character in its own right, influencing the plot and characters​ (Five Books)​.

2. Moral and Ethical Dilemmas

   • Their stories frequently explore complex moral and ethical dilemmas, adding depth to the narrative and making readers question right and wrong. This is evident in David Baldacci’s books, where characters often face tough choices that challenge their morals​ (Novel Suspects)​​ (Five Books)​.

3. Consistency and Reliability

   • These authors consistently produce high-quality content that meets reader expectations. Their reliability in delivering engaging, well-written stories has built a loyal fan base. James Patterson’s prolific output is a prime example of maintaining quality across numerous works​ (Novel Suspects)​​ (Dead Good)​.

4. Blending Genres

   • While primarily known for detective fiction, these authors often blend elements of other genres such as thrillers, psychological dramas, and literary fiction. This blending broadens their appeal and keeps their stories fresh and exciting​ (Five Books)​​ (CrimeReads)​.

Conclusion (#1)

The success of these bestselling detective fiction authors lies in their ability to create compelling characters, intricate and engaging plots, and authentic, immersive settings. Their narrative styles and thematic explorations resonate with readers, setting them apart from lesser-selling authors. By consistently delivering high-quality stories that balance suspense, realism, and depth, they have built loyal readerships and sustained their positions at the top of bestseller lists.

Me: (Not so fast…)

Could you provide more information on this for me? What you gave me here is all very good. But could you also give some advice on how to accomplish what they accomplish? I guess that would be instruction on how to create complex and relatable characters, how to create intricate plots with layered mysteries, how to create realistic and atmospheric settings/a strong sense of place, how to weave in moral and ethical dilemmas that add depth to the narrative, and how to write engaging and accessible prose that balances descriptive details with narrative momentum. For each of these things, it would be great to pull examples from these authors, but if that's not possible, I would like some kind of examples or more detailed explanations/definitions for each topic. For example, what is a good example of atmospheric writing? What is the difference between engaging and accessible prose and plain old everyday prose? So for vague statements that could mean any number of things or that need examples or defined, please provide those things. :-)

ChatGPT (Please note: I edited out repetitive information, because CGPT responded with all the above information and the “advice” portion added to each section).

This offers advice on how aspiring writers can achieve similar success.

Character Development

Complex Protagonists & Relatable Characters:

Advice: To create complex and relatable characters, start by giving them detailed backgrounds, including their personal histories, motivations, and internal conflicts. Ensure they have flaws and vulnerabilities that make them human. Use dialogue and inner monologues to reveal their thoughts and emotions.

Plot Construction

Intricate Plots and Layered Mysteries:

Advice: To create intricate plots with layered mysteries, outline your story carefully, ensuring that each plot point logically leads to the next. Introduce red herrings and subplots to add depth and complexity. Keep track of clues and revelations to ensure consistency and coherence.

Use of Realism and Authenticity

Professional Backgrounds and Realistic Settings:

Advice: To achieve realism and authenticity, research your subject matter thoroughly. If your story involves specific professions or locations, ensure your descriptions are accurate and detailed. Consider using your own experiences or consulting experts to add depth and authenticity to your writing.

Narrative Style

Engaging Prose and Atmospheric Writing:

Advice: To write engaging and accessible prose, focus on clarity and readability. Use active voice and vary sentence length to maintain a dynamic pace. For atmospheric writing, incorporate sensory details and vivid imagery to create a strong sense of place. Use metaphors and similes to enhance descriptions and evoke emotions.

Moral and Ethical Dilemmas

Exploration of Complex Issues:

Advice: To weave in moral and ethical dilemmas, develop plot points that force your characters to make difficult decisions. Consider the consequences of these decisions and how they affect the characters' development. Use these dilemmas to explore broader themes and questions about human nature and society.

Conclusion

The success of bestselling thriller and detective fiction authors lies in their ability to create compelling characters, intricate plots, and realistic settings. Their narrative styles and thematic explorations resonate with readers, setting them apart from lesser-selling authors. By consistently delivering high-quality stories that balance suspense, realism, and depth, they have built loyal readerships and sustained their positions at the top of bestseller lists.

Aspiring writers can learn from these masters by focusing on character development, plot construction, realism, engaging prose, and moral dilemmas. By honing these skills and techniques, you can create stories that captivate readers and stand out in the competitive world of fiction writing.

Me: (No, we’re not done!)

Do you think (other than Patterson's) that these stories are loved just as much for their relatable, complex protagonists as they are for their mystery elements?

ChatGPT

Yes, the stories of bestselling authors like Tana French, David Baldacci, Michael Connelly, Kathy Reichs, and Dennis Lehane are indeed loved as much for their relatable, complex protagonists as they are for their mystery elements. Here’s why:

Relatable, Complex Protagonists

1. Character Depth: Readers are drawn to characters with depth and complexity. For example, Tana French’s Cal Hooper in "The Searcher" is not just a retired detective but a man dealing with personal losses and trying to rebuild his life in a new setting. His introspective journey and interactions with the local community add layers to the story beyond the central mystery​ (Five Books)​.

2. Emotional Connection: Characters like Michael Connelly’s Harry Bosch are beloved because they are relatable and evoke emotional responses from readers. Bosch’s unwavering dedication to justice, despite personal and professional challenges, resonates with readers on a deeper level, making them invested in his journey​ (Five Books)​.

3. Moral Ambiguities: Authors like David Baldacci often create protagonists who face moral and ethical dilemmas, adding complexity to their characters. These dilemmas make the characters more human and relatable, as readers see them struggle with decisions that have no clear right or wrong answers​ (Novel Suspects)​​ (Five Books)​.

Mystery Elements

1. Intricate Plotting: The intricacy of the plots keeps readers engaged and guessing. Authors like James Patterson are masters of fast-paced, twisty plots that maintain high tension and suspense, drawing readers into the mystery​ (Novel Suspects)​.

2. Suspense and Tension: The mystery elements in these novels are expertly crafted to build suspense. For instance, Kathy Reichs uses her forensic expertise to weave detailed and believable mysteries that keep readers on the edge of their seats​ (Dead Good)​.

3. Realistic Investigations: The authenticity of the investigative processes, as seen in Reichs’ and Connelly’s works, adds a layer of realism that enhances the mystery. This authenticity helps ground the story and makes the resolution of the mystery satisfying and believable​ (Five Books)​​ (Dead Good)​.

Combined Appeal

The combination of relatable, complex protagonists and engaging mystery elements creates a compelling reading experience. The depth of the characters adds emotional weight to the stories, while the intricacy of the plots keeps readers hooked. This dual appeal is a significant factor in the success of these authors.

Advice for Writers

To achieve a similar effect in your writing:

1. Develop Multi-Dimensional Characters: Create characters with detailed backgrounds, internal conflicts, and emotional depth. Make them face personal challenges that readers can relate to.

2. Craft Intricate Plots: Plan your plots meticulously. Introduce twists and turns that keep the readers guessing, and ensure that the resolution is satisfying and logical.

3. Build Realistic Settings: Use detailed and accurate descriptions to create believable settings. This can enhance the authenticity of your story and immerse readers in the world you’ve created.

4. Incorporate Moral Dilemmas: Introduce situations where characters must make difficult decisions. This adds depth to their personalities and engages readers on an emotional level.

5. Balance Prose and Pacing: Write in an engaging and accessible style that maintains narrative momentum. Use vivid imagery and descriptive details to create atmosphere without slowing down the story. (Me: Don’t forget to use metaphors and similes!)

By focusing on these elements, you can create stories that resonate with readers both emotionally and intellectually, much like the works of these bestselling authors.

Me:

Do these authors spend a certain amount of each story showing the characters dealing with personal issues? For example, scenes that don't have anything or aren't primarily focused on the investigation and are detailing or revealing more about the protagonist's personal stuff? Such as scenes featuring the detective arguing or battling with his ex-wife?

ChatGPT

Yes, these bestselling authors often spend a significant amount of time in their stories showing their characters dealing with personal issues, which contributes to the depth and relatability of their protagonists. These scenes, while not directly related to the main investigation, add layers to the characters and make them more human. Here are some examples and explanations:

Examples from Authors

Michael Connelly

• Harry Bosch: Connelly’s Harry Bosch series frequently delves into Bosch’s personal life. For instance, Bosch’s relationships with his daughter Maddie and his ex-wife Eleanor Wish are recurring elements in the series. These interactions reveal Bosch’s vulnerabilities and his struggle to balance his demanding job with his personal responsibilities. For example, in "The Drop," Bosch deals with family issues while investigating a high-profile case​ (Five Books)​.

Tana French

• Cal Hooper: In "The Searcher," French explores Cal Hooper’s personal journey as much as the central mystery. Hooper, a retired detective, moves to a small Irish village to escape his past. The novel delves into his attempts to start anew, his reflections on his failed marriage, and his interactions with the local community. These personal elements enrich the narrative and make Hooper a more relatable character​ (Novel Suspects)​​ (Five Books)​.

David Baldacci

• Amos Decker: Baldacci’s "Memory Man" series features Amos Decker, who deals with the trauma of losing his family. Throughout the series, Decker’s personal struggles and his attempts to cope with his grief are integral to his character development. These personal scenes add depth to the story and help readers connect with Decker on a deeper level​ (Five Books)​.

Kathy Reichs

• Temperance Brennan: Reichs’ Temperance Brennan often faces personal challenges alongside her professional duties. In the "Bones" series, Brennan’s relationships, particularly with her daughter and ex-husband, are explored in detail. These personal elements provide a fuller picture of Brennan’s character and make her more relatable to readers​ (Dead Good)​.

Common Techniques

1. Balancing Personal and Professional Lives: These authors effectively balance the protagonists’ personal lives with their professional responsibilities. This dual focus helps create well-rounded characters.

2. Internal Conflicts and Growth: The personal scenes often highlight internal conflicts and character growth. This adds depth and complexity to the protagonists.

3. Relatability and Empathy: By showing the characters dealing with everyday issues, such as family conflicts or personal losses, the authors make their protagonists more relatable and evoke empathy from the readers.

Advice for Writers

Creating Complex Characters with Personal Issues

1. Incorporate Personal Storylines: Include scenes that focus on the character’s personal life. These could involve family conflicts, romantic relationships, or personal challenges unrelated to the main plot.

2. Show Vulnerability: Allow your characters to be vulnerable. Show them dealing with personal losses, making mistakes, or facing dilemmas that have no easy solutions.

3. Develop Relationships: Flesh out the protagonist’s relationships with secondary characters. These relationships can reveal different aspects of the protagonist’s personality and add depth to the story.

4. Balance is Key: Ensure that the personal scenes enhance the narrative without overshadowing the main plot. They should complement the story and provide insight into the character, not distract from the primary storyline.

Example

Scene in a Detective Novel: Imagine a scene where your detective protagonist, Alex, is dealing with a custody battle for his child. He’s just come home after a long day of chasing leads and finds a letter from his ex-wife’s lawyer. The letter threatens to limit his visitation rights. Alex’s frustration and helplessness in this situation reveal his softer side and the personal stakes he has beyond the case he’s working on. This scene adds depth to Alex’s character and makes his professional determination even more poignant because readers understand what he’s fighting for personally.

Conclusion

The ability to seamlessly weave personal issues into the main narrative is a hallmark of successful storytelling in the thriller and detective genres. By creating complex characters who deal with relatable personal struggles, these bestselling authors make their protagonists more human and their stories more engaging. Aspiring writers can learn from these techniques to develop their own compelling characters and narratives.

Me:

And in the stories you just listed from the different authors, can you tell me what the protagonist's internal conflict is for each of those books?

ChatGPT

Sure, here are the internal conflicts of the protagonists from the listed stories by Michael Connelly, Tana French, David Baldacci, Kathy Reichs, and Dennis Lehane:

Michael Connelly - Harry Bosch in "The Drop"

Internal Conflict: Harry Bosch deals with the tension between his relentless pursuit of justice and the bureaucratic obstacles within the LAPD. He also struggles with his aging and the physical and emotional toll of his career. Bosch's internal conflict is exacerbated by his complex relationships, particularly with his daughter Maddie and his ex-wife Eleanor, which challenge his ability to balance his personal and professional lives​ (Five Books)​.

Tana French - Cal Hooper in "The Searcher"

Internal Conflict: Cal Hooper grapples with his disillusionment and burnout from his career as a detective in Chicago, as well as the emotional aftermath of a bruising divorce. His move to a small Irish village is an attempt to find peace, but he is drawn into a local mystery that forces him to confront his past and question whether he can ever truly escape his nature as a detective​ (Novel Suspects)​​ (Five Books)​.

David Baldacci - Amos Decker in "Memory Man"

Internal Conflict: Amos Decker deals with the trauma and guilt of losing his family in a brutal murder. His hyperthymesia, a condition that gives him perfect memory, means he cannot forget any detail of the tragedy, which continuously haunts him. Decker's internal conflict revolves around his quest for justice and his struggle to find purpose and meaning in his life after such a devastating personal loss​ (Five Books)​.

Kathy Reichs - Temperance Brennan in "Bones" series

Internal Conflict: Temperance Brennan's internal conflict involves balancing her demanding career as a forensic anthropologist with her personal life. She often faces ethical dilemmas in her work and deals with the emotional strain of her past, including her struggles with alcoholism and complex relationships with her daughter and ex-husband. Brennan's drive for professional excellence sometimes conflicts with her personal desires and relationships​ (Dead Good)​.

Dennis Lehane - Mary Pat Fennessy in "Small Mercies"

Internal Conflict: In "Small Mercies," Mary Pat Fennessy faces the internal conflict of dealing with her missing daughter amidst the backdrop of racial tensions in 1974 Boston. Her search for her daughter forces her to confront her own biases, the limitations of her community, and her role as a mother. Mary Pat's journey is one of resilience and reckoning with the harsh realities of her environment and her past actions​ (Five Books)​.

Analysis and Examples

These internal conflicts are integral to the characters' development and add depth to the narrative. They make the protagonists relatable and their struggles compelling, engaging readers on both an emotional and intellectual level. Here’s how you can incorporate similar depth into your characters:

Creating Complex Characters with Internal Conflicts

1. Detail Backgrounds: Develop detailed backstories that explain the characters’ current situations and motivations. Consider their past experiences, relationships, and personal challenges.

2. Show Vulnerability: Allow your characters to be vulnerable. Show them struggling with personal issues that affect their actions and decisions.

3. Balance Personal and Professional Lives: Illustrate how their personal lives impact their professional responsibilities and vice versa. This adds realism and relatability to the characters.

Examples of Internal Conflict

• Struggling with Personal Loss: Like Amos Decker, a character haunted by the loss of a loved one can have their actions driven by a need for justice or redemption.

• Balancing Dual Roles: Characters like Temperance Brennan, who juggle demanding careers with personal responsibilities, can face ethical dilemmas and personal sacrifices that add depth to their stories.

By focusing on these aspects, you can create protagonists with rich internal conflicts that enhance the overall narrative and resonate deeply with readers.

Me:

Do any of these protagonists have unlikeable qualities? Is there anything about any of them that readers may not like a lot, but they accept it because otherwise, they are decent people, and no one is perfect?

ChatGPT

Yes, the protagonists created by these bestselling authors often have unlikeable qualities, which makes them more realistic and relatable. These flaws add depth to their characters and make their personal journeys more compelling. Here are some examples:

Michael Connelly - Harry Bosch

Unlikeable Qualities:

• Stubbornness: Bosch is notoriously stubborn and often disregards orders from his superiors, which can lead to conflicts within the LAPD.

• Aloofness: He tends to be emotionally distant, which affects his personal relationships, including those with his daughter and colleagues.

• Rule-Breaking: Bosch’s tendency to bend or break the rules in his pursuit of justice can make him seem reckless and insubordinate.

Reader Acceptance: Despite these flaws, readers accept and even admire Bosch because his determination to seek justice and his moral integrity outweigh his unlikeable traits​ (Five Books)​.

Tana French - Cal Hooper

Unlikeable Qualities:

• Isolationist Tendencies: Hooper's inclination to isolate himself after his career and marriage troubles can make him seem closed off and unapproachable.

• Reluctance to Engage: Initially, he is reluctant to get involved in the local mystery, which might frustrate readers looking for a proactive protagonist.

Reader Acceptance: Readers relate to Hooper’s need for solitude and healing. His gradual involvement in the community and the mystery shows his growth and willingness to overcome personal challenges​ (Novel Suspects)​​ (Five Books)​.

David Baldacci - Amos Decker

Unlikeable Qualities:

• Aloofness: Decker’s perfect memory (hyperthymesia) and the trauma of losing his family make him emotionally detached and socially awkward.

• Obsessiveness: His intense focus on his work and solving cases can sometimes come off as obsessive and uncompromising.

Reader Acceptance: Decker’s tragic backstory and his relentless pursuit of justice make him a sympathetic character. His unique abilities and the pain he endures add depth to his persona​ (Five Books)​.

Kathy Reichs - Temperance Brennan

Unlikeable Qualities:

• Workaholic Nature: Brennan’s dedication to her work often leads to neglect of her personal life and relationships.

• Bluntness: She can be overly blunt and direct, which sometimes alienates those around her.

Reader Acceptance: Readers appreciate Brennan’s expertise and dedication. Her personal struggles and commitment to uncovering the truth make her a compelling and admirable character despite her flaws​ (Dead Good)​.

Dennis Lehane - Mary Pat Fennessy

Unlikeable Qualities:

• Harshness: Mary Pat can be harsh and unforgiving, shaped by the tough environment of 1970s Boston.

• Prejudices: She initially harbors biases that reflect the divided community she lives in.

Reader Acceptance: Mary Pat’s fierce love for her daughter and her determination to find her despite numerous obstacles make her an empathetic character. Her journey towards understanding and overcoming her biases adds a layer of redemption to her story​ (Five Books)​.

Advice for Writers

To create protagonists with unlikeable qualities that readers will still accept and root for, consider the following:

1. Balance Flaws with Redeeming Qualities: Ensure that the character’s flaws are balanced by redeeming qualities, such as a strong moral code, determination, or kindness.

2. Show Growth and Development: Allow your characters to evolve. Show how their experiences and challenges lead to personal growth and improvement.

3. Make Flaws Relatable: Flaws should be relatable and realistic. Readers are more likely to accept and connect with characters who exhibit human weaknesses.

4. Use Flaws to Drive the Plot: Integrate the character’s flaws into the storyline. Use their mistakes and struggles to create conflict and drive the narrative forward.

Example

Scene: Imagine a scene where your detective protagonist, Alex, is known for his temper. During a heated argument with a colleague, he says something he regrets. This moment of weakness can lead to a subplot where Alex must make amends, showing his capacity for growth and humility. This humanizes Alex and makes his journey more relatable.

By incorporating these techniques, you can create complex, flawed characters that readers will find compelling and relatable, even if they don't always like them.

Me:

Okay. I think I'm good for now. Thank you so much. This has been really really helpful

ChatGPT

You're very welcome! I'm glad I could help. If you have any more questions or need further assistance in the future, feel free to reach out. Happy writing!

Me: A couple questions for you guys.

1. Do any of you have conversations like this with ChatGPT? I think I interact with this AI more than I do any human in my life lately. He (yeah, I think of it as he) is a never-ending source of good information.

2. If you use ChatGPT, do you say please and thank you? LOL. I know I’m not the only one.

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